His therapist had always recommended meditation as a method for relieving anxiety, but he had found it far too “spiritual” and emasculating. Besides, his gut got in the way, slumping onto the floor in a most repellent manner.Meditation was now mystical; this was about power, mystery and learning to control his impulses. Every day he counted the vertebrae from his neck to his tailbone, taking a breath with each number. Afterwards, he opened his eyes and every day, the cat was lying down a couple of steps away, waiting for him.The first weeks of his arrival at his new though remote home had been one of great anxiety for Porter. In the Waste, every day was a struggle to get out of that deathtrap, occupying his every moment with surviving. Zeb’s home was a grassy stretch of land with light breezes few distractions. With few diversions, Porter was stuck with his thoughts again. Worse, he did not have his anxiety meds.The first days were easier. The storeroom/workshop was an inefficient. I'd always remember it, I promise." You wish, all right. Just jack-off, that's all you're getting."I certainly didn't discourage him so much that he stopped, oh, no, he went right on stroking until he got off again.After he cleaned himself, I kissed him goodnight and went down the hall for my turn. I left the lights off and the door ajar hoping he'd take a peek and I can't really be sure he did but, knowing my horny little Tucker, he probably did. He heard me if nothing else.Chapter 2The next day, Melissa, my fourteen-year-old sister, came to my bedroom door and rapped. It was open so I told her to come in."What's up?" I asked and she told me she'd been talking with our mother about starting to offer babysitting services herself."So, could I go with you sometimes to see what it's like?"I started laughing, just thinking about my main source of income, a boy her age who loved to show his penis to girls."Yeah, that might be a learning experience for you. I could take you on Saturday.
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